my best friend told me:
being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect,
it only means you've decided to see past the imperfections.
i think happiness is a fragile thing. especially now. it seems to come and go so quickly these days. i feel like happiness isn't something i'm capable of keeping, and i guess i feel weak that i'm not capable of seeing past all of the hard times, trials, and tribulations. maybe i'm just one of those my-life-is-so-hard kind of people. or maybe, it's not always possible to be constantly happy during trials. i would imagine that's how it is. perhaps i'm not seeing the big picture in all of this. maybe i'm not learning everything that i need to be. maybe this trial seems so endless because i'm not grasping the fine print here. maybe there's a little message that's been tugging at me for so long, but i refused to believe it and therefore, continuously hurt myself.
it really makes you wonder, is it really that bad?
or are you just exaggerating it to avoid the truth?
in everything that's happened in the last month, maybe i'm the problem. maybe i'm keeping myself from moving on and getting past this. maybe the only thing standing between me and my happiness is a stubborn, needy, side of me that just can't drop it. maybe i'm making everything harder for myself by not facing the truth and being ignorant and childish. the truth hurts. i guess at some point i have to realize things aren't always going to go my way and i have to learn to work with the hand i've been given.
excuse me, i know i'm venting and that to the majority of you,
it probably makes absolutely no sense. but this is a blog. and
i think i just need to get a lot of things off my chest right now.
ummmm. yes. we really are sisters.
ReplyDeleteOr maybe just the same person. This is excatly what i was thinking. Exactly.
maybe somebody like cloned our brains and stuck them in different bodies.
ReplyDeleteor yeah... maybe we're just sisters.